My last post made me think (and I know what you're thinking - well, that makes one of us, Lt. - and to you I say shut the fuck up): imagine if I took all the shit in my posts that goes into parentheses and instead put it all in footnotes (even my footnotes would have footnotes).
(Leaving aside the fact that I have no idea how to make footnotes work on blogger) I'd be David Motherfucking Foster Wallace!!
Go, Lt.
Yes, go, you're thinking. Go already.
And this business of me telling you what you think/say is what my wife does to me. She has whole conversations with me where I don't have to say a word because she does my talking for me.
It's wonderful (as long as she doesn't veer off course from what I'd actually say, which she rarely does (which is kind of scary) <-- see - that's a place right there where there'd be a footnote within a footnote) because I don't have to pause in drinking my beer to respond.
One day soon she'll say to me, "That was a great conversation we had last night, hon."
And I'll say (because this time she'll wait for my response), "I wasn't home last night, darling."
And she'll say, "Yeah, so?"
I'm not sure where I'm going with this.
Oh yeah:
David Motherfucking C*cks&cking Foster Wallace!
(do i have any readers left at all?)
Thursday, June 23, 2011
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5 comments:
You still have me. But I knew what you were going to write before you wrote it. Yes, I'm that good.
Ha! Very funny.
I was waiting for Belimperia's comment and she didn't disappoint :)
I am a faithful reader. I'm not sure what the hell you've said here, but I *did* read it.
My wife does that all the time (having conversations with me without me.). I'm sure the stuff I say in her head is a lot less volatile than what I would say aloud. Probably why we are still together.
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